Conquering Hollow Knight's Trial of the Conqueror: My Epic Gauntlet of Blood, Sweat, and Broken Controllers

I still wake up in cold sweats remembering my first attempt at Hollow Knight's Trial of the Conqueror - a soul-crushing gauntlet that makes Dark Souls look like toddler tumble time! When that 450 geo vanished from my pockets at the Colosseum's ominous middle banner, I knew I'd volunteered for digital torture. Little did I realize I'd be battling through 17 waves of nightmare fuel where every enemy feels like a personalized insult from Team Cherry. This trial doesn't just test your skills; it dissects your sanity layer by layer like a sadistic archaeologist!

The Agonizing Wave Breakdown

1. Opening Salvo:

2. Heavy Fools charging like runaway dump trucks 🚚

3. Winged Fools dive-bombing like caffeinated hawks

4. Pro Tip: Nail-bounce their heads like hyperactive pogo sticks!

5. Platform Peril Waves:

6. Armored Squits kamikaze-diving like suicidal lawn darts

7. Spikes erupting faster than my panic attacks

8. Primal Aspids spitting acid like defective garden sprinklers 💦

9. The Infamous Wave 13:

10. Pure spike floors with wall-jumping required

11. Enemy spawns timed to exploit mid-air vulnerability

12. My Experience: Felt like juggling chainsaws while tightrope walking!

13. Final Boss Carnage:

| Wave | Enemies | Nightmare Level |

|------|---------|-----------------|

| 15 | Battle Obbles | 😱😱😱 |

| 16 | Ceiling Crush Obbles | 😱😱😱😱 |

| 17 | Oblobbles | MAXIMUM TERROR |

Essential Survival Kit

• MANDATORY Gear:

• Monarch Wings (double jump)

• Shade Cloak (dash through attacks)

• Nail upgraded to at least Channeled level

• Charms That Saved My Sanity:

• Quick Focus (heal faster than enemies insult you)

• Grubsong (soul from pain - poetic!)

• Unbreakable Strength (because everything has too much HP!)

Pro Gamer Secrets I Learned the Hard Way

• Heal during Wave 10's "grub reward" fakeout - it's the only calm before the storm!

• Spells > Nail for flying enemies (Vengeful Spirit clears Aspids like a divine sneeze)

• Wave 7's single Belfry is Team Cherry trolling us - avoid it like my ex's phone calls!

People Also Ask

❓ "Can I skip Monarch Wings?"

Only if you enjoy spike-floor back massages! Without double jumps, Wave 13 becomes an autopsy simulator.

❓ "How much geo does it drop?"

2000 geo - barely enough compensation for therapy bills!

❓ "Worth the Pale Ore reward?"

Absolutely! That nail upgrade turns the next trial from impossible to merely cruel.

My Personal Future Outlook

As I clutch my hard-earned Pale Ore in 2025, I eye the Trial of the Fool like a mountaineer stares at Everest - equal parts terror and exhilaration. Mark my words: I'll conquer it using what this trial taught me. When enemies swarm, I'll dance through them like a vengeful ballet dancer! When platforms vanish, I'll soar with Monarch Wings like a knightly hummingbird! This Colosseum hasn't broken me; it forged me into Hallownest's ultimate warrior! 💪

Final Metaphors for the Fallen

• Those Heavy Fools? Charging like overclocked washing machines during spin cycle!

• Oblobble projectiles? Like being caught in a rave hosted by angry glitter cannons!

• Wave 13's spikes? A loving hug from a cactus bride on your wedding day!

Remember, aspiring conquerors: This trial isn't beaten through skill alone. It requires the stubbornness of a mule doing calculus and the persistence of a termite chewing through titanium. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to ice my thumbs and cry in the shower...